In this new millennium, faster appears to be better: faster computers, faster Internet connections, instant messaging and text messaging to name a few. In personal relationships, however, faster is not better. We all need time to process our experience. Meaningful relating takes time. Feeling understood and accepted, believing that the other person cares about what you are saying, relaxing and just being with another person with no particular goal other than enjoying the time together are all experiences that take time. Similarly, I believe that a good counseling relationship takes time. However, many clients come to therapy in a hurry. Some of them even want to begin therapy immediately. I have had several clients ask me if I can see them the same day that they call me. They want to solve the problem as quickly and painlessly as possible.
Humanistic sandtray therapists are not in a hurry and they trust the therapeutic process of clients. Humanistic therapists view the client as self-actualizing and "endowed with an inherent tendency to develop his or her potential" (Cain, 2002, p. 3). Clients are seen as having the ability to use inner resources for growth. Humanistic sandtray therapists believe that people are capable of being self-aware and responsible for the choices they make. Clients are viewed as social beings that have a powerful need to belong. In humanistic psychotherapy, the therapeutic relationship is the fundamental source of constructive change in the client (Cain, 2002). The primary goal in the therapeutic relationship is to create an optimal climate for growth.
In humanistic sandtray therapy, therapists focus on the present for the most part. The clients and therapists' in-the-moment experience is in the foreground and the past or future are in the background. This focus requires humanistic sandtray therapists to be highly self-aware and attuned to their own inner world the inner subjective experience of their clients. Humanistic therapists accept clients where they are and travel along with clients as they struggle to grow. It is also important for humanistic sandtray therapists to develop a true genuineness. Rogers (1989) contended that "the more the therapist is himself or herself in the relationship, putting up no professional front or personal façade, the greater is the likelihood the client will change and grow in a constructive manner" (p. 135).
Rogers (1989) also noted that a genuine therapist
is openly being the feelings and attitudes that are flowing within at the moment. There is a close matching, or congruence, between what is being experienced at the gut level, what is present in awareness, and what is expressed to the client (p. 135).
No one wants a therapist who is playing a role. I think that we all want someone who we can believe and who walks the walk. I find congruence and genuineness to be somewhat of a rare quality in people. I do not know that many truly real people I know.
In addition to being real, it is essential for humanistic sandtray therapists to be empathic. Rogers (1989) stated that empathic understanding is present when "the therapist senses accurately the feelings and personal meanings that the client is experiencing and communicates this acceptant understanding to the client" (p. 136). Rogers also noted that the most powerful empathy is when the therapist not only clarifies the meanings of which the client is aware but also those below the level of awareness. Clarifying feelings and meanings of which clients are unaware is an advanced skill that takes time and experience to develop. Quality supervision facilitates this kind of professional development and provides the climate for continued growth.
Stephen A. Armstrong, Ph.D., is an Associate Professor at Texas A&M University-Commerce. He has published numerous refereed articles in professional journals including several articles on sandtray therapy. Recently, he published a book, Sandtray Therapy: A Humanistic Approach. He also founded Sandtray Therapy Institute, which provides quality training and publications in humanistic sandtray therapy. The submitted article includes excerpts from his book on sandtray therapy, which can be found on his site.
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